Sunday, March 2, 2014

I Said I Would NEVER, but...


If I could choose any phrase that describes what 2014 has been like for me, this would be it.  “I said I would NEVER, but…” 

What are those things that you said you would NEVER do? 
I am not talking about sinful things that you really should never do.  I am talking about things that were never your preference, or perhaps you had some very valid reasons for saying you would never do something. 

And in the spirit of complete honesty, can I just tell you that every time someone says “Never say never” in that sing-song voice I want to punch them?  Of course, I wouldn’t punch them.  But, without the proper self-control, that is what I would do.  I sincerely dislike when people say things like “Never say never” in a sing-song voice whilst grinning.  It feels like they should really just say, “You are an idiot and one day I will point at you and laugh and say ‘I told you so’.”  Perhaps I am a little touchy.

Also, I am pretty sure that just today I said, “Never say never” to a girl in my Sunday morning class.  I should have punched myself.  I have been thinking about this blog post for a couple days now and she just so happened to make a statement today that started with I NEVER….  Abby and I laughed, hard.  We also told her that she better find us when she is older and her “never” has happened and then we could just smile at her. 

So there have been a few things in my life that I have said I would NEVER do, or would NEVER happen.  And I think that in the last couple of months there has been some conspiracy to make sure all of those things actually happen.  Wow, has God humbled me in the last few months.

Here is a list of things I said NEVER about:

1. Going to India. 
Truth be told, I watched Slum-Dog Millionaire (which was a great movie btw), and I was totally disgusted by some of the things in the movie.  I realize this is about the same as watching some movie about the worst possible places in the USA and then thinking the whole country is like that.  I never said it was rational. 
I also remember listening to our case worker for our home study as she recounted her adoption from India.  And I remember thinking, “This is so precious, but I just don’t feel a desire to go to that country.  Get me somewhere in Africa!” 
I remember seeing pictures from a friend’s trip to India a couple of years ago.  Her pictures were wonderful but I remember thinking, “I miss Africa so much.  I would totally rather be there.”

And now, we are walking down a path that will likely lead us straight to India!  And I am EXCITED!!  Even more so, I am looking forward to seeing the sweet face of our daughter in her native country, among a people who look like her.  I look forward to seeing that precious face every day once we bring her home.  We will forever be linked to India.

2. Aiden and Noah being in the same school grade.
Oh, this one is a fresh helping of humble pie.  We had a long list of reasons why we thought Noah and Aiden should not be in the same school grade.  And they are valid reasons in my opinion.  Finally, it was as if God was saying that we needed to take a step back and evaluate what was best for each child without allowing the decision to be effected by the other child.  Tough stuff my friends.  We found that we were continually trying to see which child would be least affected by the decision that was best for the other.  And it just so happens that what is best for each of them individually will then mean that they will be in the same grade.

3. Aiden being ready for first grade in the fall.
To say that Kenneth and I have been concerned about Aiden’s academic endeavors would be a gross understatement.  In fact, if you had asked me about this at Christmas, I would have said no way is he ready to move on.
I remember listening to kindergarten orientation and his teacher saying, “I have never had one child leave my classroom without being able to read at least a little.  I even had a girl who could hardly spell her name and she left reading.”  I was like, “Lady, you crazy.  My child will probably be your first.”  Please don’t think I am being mean to Aiden.  I’m not.  Just honest.  We were very concerned about possible learning deficits. 

Wouldn’t you know, in the last several weeks the child is flourishing?!  He IS reading!!  And the other night he blew us away and counted to 100 with absolutely no help!!  We have never even practiced that at home with him.  He has done far greater than we expected.  I am so proud of him!

And speaking of schooling, here is the grand-daddy of them all….

4. Homeschool.
Seriously. 
For those of you who know me, I will give you a minute to breathe or pick yourself up off the floor or stop dying of laughter……..

I am still in shock over this one.  (If anyone reads this, PUHLEEZE understand that the purpose of this post is not to start a schooling debate.)  Kenneth and I have regretted sending Noah to school when we did.  He has a late birthday and has always been the youngest in his class.  Although he is very smart, we wanted him to be one of the oldest rather than youngest.  We sent him to school when we did because we wanted to keep he and Aiden separate.  And that meant he had to go early.  And we have been kicking ourselves ever since.  We have talked with his teacher about retaining him and apparently this is the worst idea ever.  It does not seem like the school would let us do this especially because he is one of the best readers in his class.  So, we looked into the private school in our area which is way out of our budget.  And the more we prayed about it, the more we felt God leading us to homeschool Noah in the fall.  It is as if He chose this for Noah.  Obviously He did.  I said I would NEVER unless we were on the international mission field. 

Those who know me well, I will give you another minute.  I know you need it.….

Right now our plan is to homeschool Noah for one year and re-evaluate.  He may go back to Creekview, and he may not.  I have learned that it is not wise for me to make definite statements where this is concerned.

I am now on a mission to try to remember all the non-sinful things I said I would NEVER do just so I can know what I have to look forward to doing in the next few weeks.

2 comments:

  1. oh friend. I say this all the time. Or I am that annoying person that says to newer moms, "oh, just wait...." and then I want to kick myself because I hate when debbie downers like me start to say things like that! Anyway, YES. NEVER....say....NEVER. I felt like that about anencephaly and the way we dealt with the pregnancy (having to induce before 40 weeks), ending nursing before 1 year (how dare people do that...oh unless you bring a child home from africa and your biological child REFUSES to nurse...), etc, etc etc. I could go on and on. What i comes down to, for me, is PRIDE. I thought, "oh, i have it figured out and I AM RIGHT". And God loves to shove that back at me (just like I say to my kids)...."who is the boss, Finn?"..."mama is the boss" (and I think...'that's right'!, so OBEY already!) and I'm sure God is thinking the same thing about me. :) I'm the boss, so OBEY already! Oh, and I'm pretty sure I will end up having to pull Eli back or move Finn up and so I think they'll end up together in the same grade as well. Should be interesting. Take some notes.

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  2. You are brilliant...to recognize early on you know nothing. At least ahead of time:) James is so RIGHT... Why do you say you will do thus and so? You should say if The Lord wills we will... The good news is He loves your kids more than you, and He will have your complete surrender for the same reason, He loves you!
    Your friend,
    Shores:)

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